Dezvoltare personală și profesională, cu cap și cu drag 'Smart with Heart' personal&professional development
I often ask my partners (as I call my clients) about the kind of success they want to achieve. Where are they first looking for validation? Outward, as a public recognition, in which case success is an objective or a goal in itself, or inward, where success is measured by having fulfilled the need to make a difference?
To me, this differentiation is critical in taking the right steps toward achieving one’s goals. The outward validation (that we all look for at some point in time) is more about doing what is expected of us, as it is with a promotion, getting a better job or moving in higher circles. On the other hand, the inward recognition takes a more sinuous path that has no rules, no indicators, sometimes no clear expectations at all (“ I don’t know what I want” or “I don’t know what my thing is”) and is entirely based on knowing who we are.
The first instance doesn’t imply practicing what you preach. This is why many people in important jobs, with power, and very much successful, are often described by their colleagues in ways that do not compliment anyone. It’s because for this type of success, one’s values and qualities as a human being matter less than the ability to follow some rules and to fulfill other’s expectations. These people detach themselves from what they are doing and, although they regard their success as their merit, quite often they admit that they got where they are by making some “small” compromises. Detached as they are from themselves however, they always put the blame for these compromises on the Big Bad Wolf. Life, that is, that forced them to do something they otherwise wouldn’t.
Success as an effect of having responded to an acute need to make a difference starting within, to offer a part of one’s soul, of one’s being, to the world, is an entirely different story.
Not everybody has this need. And, unfortunately, from those who do, few have the courage to follow it, especially when they look around and see that outward success seems to weight heavier in everybody’s eyes. It’s perfectly understandable to feel discouraged.
But there comes a time when the need is stronger than any rational process. And if we’re not on the right path, that’s when frustration manifests. Then we start to look around to see what we can do about it. Are there people, just like us, with this kind of internal construct, who acted on their inner calling and succeeded?
Of course, the answer is yes. We meet or pass by exceptional people every day. People who transformed their lives and became the creators of their most dear reality, simply by listening to themselves and forming a lifetime partnership with their interior voice. They are the ones who practice what they preach. They are the ones whose products or services or entire businesses tell us a lot about themselves, their values and principles. Because the only people who practice what they preach are the ones who put their soul in their creation. And for them, the dearest form of success comes when they give life to their creation or see it becoming tangible.
So to rise to my own challenge, I present you part of my creation. My first book, “Mama e iubire, de ce-mi vorbiti de cancer?” (Mother is Love, Why Do You Speak of Cancer?). My dearest success ever since I took the path of authenticity. I put my soul in it, my knowledge and my love of people. And this wasn’t an objective. This was me answering to the need to help. So I brought to life a book like none other I had ever read. This was me practicing what I preach.
What is your inward success story? Share it! Be an example to all the people who are now feeling the need to create for the first time. Show them it is possible!
(foto: Sărutul, Constantin Brâncuși)